“Love always, your wife.”

one of the even less pleasant things about packing for this move (than packing in and of itself) is having to go through all of the reminders of my marriage and the good things my ex used to be and mean to me, the person i loved. the blog title comes from the ending of a birthday card she left at the house for me on july 1 2003 since she was going to be out. anyway…
last night a spent a nice evening relaxing at brasil. sometimes it’s good to get out and just sit somewhere and talk and drink coffee, to have a chance to get away from packing and the emotional strain that can pop out unexpectedly when i find something i’d forgotten about.
today at work i got in touch with the qdro departement for my old company’s retirement group. actually, i gave up on the qdro folk ever calling me back and called the general help line — then they connected me to a qdro person they’d called. the end result was i learned that i can submit the stupid qdro myself, thus bypassing the ineptness of tamara and/or her attorney. it’s either that or they’re evil…i suppose either is entirely plausible. whatever the case, it’ll be nice to get that crap out of the way.
which brings me to the house. when i got home after work today i could tell someone had been in the house. the curtain to the sliding glass door was half open, and the master bathroom door was open (for example). no one had contacted me about coming into the house, or left a message about it. i was pretty pissed. i didn’t really care for the idea of living here while people came and went while it was showing, but i understood it was a necessary annoyance if i didn’t want to pay two rents. since the house has been off the market for like two months now, i shouldn’t have to be dealing with it. and even if i was, it shouldn’t be without my consent, or at least letting me know.
so i emailed my realtor and told her about it, and asked if we could remove the lockbox so this kind of thing wouldn’t happen in the future. within a few hours she wrote me an email apologizing that it was her fault because she was supposed to let me know the buyer’s agent was going to be coming into the house with another repairman for estimates.
not that it necessarily should, but this really concerns me because this is the same pattern that happened with the last two buyers and then they backed out. i’m tired of everything tamara is still somehow involved in being a pain in the 4ss to deal with. at this point the house has been off the market for a couple of months, and if a third buyer falls through i’m going to be really annoyed. i was content enough just letting things go along, but since i moved everything forward i’m getting tired of being in an unnatural middle state. either the buyer buys or they don’t, but i’ve been strung through a couple of months due to three buyers and tamara, and i’d really just like to get it out of the way.
my life will be much simpler and carefree once this sh1te is over with. i’ve already wasted enough time on worthless causes. of course, that’s a lot easier to say (or type, as the case may be) than to actually believe and feel. still, i think i’m looking forward to having all the loose ends tied up and my life being my own once again. which doesn’t mean that’s what i wanted, but i’ve got to play the cards life and tamara dealt me. and if yet another buyer backs out, i’ll just have to keep rolling with the punches.