the secret message for tamara

ah, the happy-go-lucky fun friday post…
earlier, i said i would put up a copy of the drawing/note i left (i.e., hid) in one of the xmas ornament boxes tamara came by and picked up. here it is:
View image
it might require a bit of explaining. you see, a few years ago i told tamara i’d been thinking about what i would do if i were in a car wreck and was dying…i’d want to make some kind of final statement. but being broken and dying, the only ability i’d have to write would be by using my own blood as ink. so, after thinking about it, i had decided what i’d write is that i loved her. a final note to let her know. she said it was one of the most romantic things anyone had ever said to her. (we sort of had an angelina jolie / billy bob thornton thing going on in some ways.) so that was my inspiration for this image. the text was somewhat spur of the moment, although i’ve thought for months about what kind of final statement(s) i’d like to make to tamara (given that this might as well be the equivalent of one of us dying). sometimes it was angry, sometimes sad, sometimes hopeful…but what’s on that paper is what came out in the end.
so whether or not she appreciates it, or even sees it, it is now on public display for anyone who may stumble across it.

3 comments on “the secret message for tamara”

  1. Wow, you don’t fuck around with this blog. I really appreciate that. I’m glad I stumbled here. I (and I think I can speak for Jo too) wish you the best.

  2. hello,
    I just thought it was kinda crazy that i stumbled upon your blog. Seeing my name is Tamara, and it was just weird to read this about annother girl. It is pretty strange to find the Tamara spelt the same way too.

  3. hopefully you’re not “another” tamara inhabiting the same body as my ex. (seeing as she recreates herself now and then. 🙂 just kidding. (i think.) anyway…
    that’s actually the most common spelling i’ve seen for the name. though most people i’ve known pronounced it ta”-muh-ruh’. my ex-wife, on the other hand, had a slavic (?) pronuncation, which is tuh-ma”-ruh (sounds kind of like “tomorrow”). her parents named her after a russian olympic gymnast, if i recall.
    anyway, hope it wasn’t too freaky of an experience for you. it *is* kind of crazy you’d stumble onto my blog though, since it’s in a back corner of the internet, behind some old boxes and cobwebs, underneath a stack of old national geographics.

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